What Does an Elopement Ceremony Look Like? Your Complete Guide to Planning a Non-Traditional Ceremony
When you hear the word “elopement,” what comes to mind? If you’re picturing a rushed ceremony at the courthouse or a secretive Vegas wedding, it’s time to reimagine what modern elopements can be. Today’s elopement ceremonies are intentional, intimate celebrations that put the focus exactly where it should be – on your love story.
While traditional weddings follow a fairly standard script that most people have come to anticipate, one of the most beautiful aspects of an elopement ceremony – much like an elopement day itself – is its flexibility. But that freedom to create your own ceremony sometimes leaves couples wondering: “What exactly happens during an elopement ceremony?”
The Heart of an Elopement Ceremony
At its core, an elopement ceremony shares the same meaningful elements as a traditional wedding ceremony – it’s a celebration of people committing their lives to one another. The main difference? You get to strip away any traditions that don’t resonate with you and focus on what matters most.
Just like traditional weddings, elopement ceremonies typically include:
- Personal vows (whether written by you or traditional)
- Exchange of rings or other meaningful symbols
- Your first kiss as a married couple
- Optional unity ceremonies that hold special meaning for you
Personal vows can be written by you, or a script that someone leading your ceremony asks you to repeat after them. Looking for help with writing your own personalized vows? Check out my guide here! A vow exchange, even at a small elopement with a few guests, can still seem too personal to share with others witnessing. Much like a wedding day, you have the freedom of exchanging your vows privately, even if you have a more public ceremony with loved ones later.
Unity ceremonies are a fun way to give your elopement ceremony more gravitas, and to commemorate this next step in your relationship journey as you unite your unique selves into one marriage moving forward. Click here to see my guide to unique unity ceremonies!
Who Leads an Elopement Ceremony?
Depending on your location and preferences, you have several options for who conducts your ceremony:
- Self-solemnization (legal in Colorado!): You can lead your own ceremony without an officiant
- Hired officiant: A professional who can guide you through the ceremony (and sometimes helps with writing your vows, and often helps with the legal stuff before/after!)
- Loved one: A close friend or family member who gets ordained to perform your ceremony. They can also lead your ceremony while you self-solemnize the paperwork.
Note: Requirements vary by state. While Colorado doesn’t require an officiant or witnesses, other states like Utah do. Your elopement photographer/planner or officiant can help you navigate the legal requirements for your chosen location.
Why Choose an Elopement Ceremony?
Elopement ceremonies are perfect for couples who:
- Value intimate moments over grand productions
- Want to exchange vows in a stunning natural setting, that really couldn’t accommodate large groups
- Feel more comfortable expressing their emotions privately
- Prefer to focus their resources on experiences over formal events
If you’re feeling more drawn to eloping, click here to see why more couples are choosing to elope to search if you feel like eloping is for you.
Making Your Elopement Ceremony Meaningful
Just because you’re eloping doesn’t mean you have to skip meaningful traditions. Consider incorporating:
- A “first look” moment in a breathtaking location – or even getting ready together
- Walking together to your ceremony spot
- Reading letters from loved ones who couldn’t be there in person
- Including special family traditions or cultural elements that elevate your experience – this is your wedding day after all!
Your elopement ceremony may look a little different than a wedding – you may or may not have a “walking down the aisle” moment like in a church. Many do have an “aisle” of sorts though if it’s important to you! Similarly, your elopement may or may not have guests. If it does have guests, they might be standing and gathering around you instead of in seats on two sides.
Try not to get too hung up in making your elopement ceremony identical to a wedding ceremony, and instead focus on making it feel special, memorable, meaningful and personal. This is why you decided to elope, after all!
After You Say “I Do”
The moments following your elopement ceremony can be just as special. Here are some things you may choose to do after your ceremony:
- Toast to your new marriage with champagne or your favorite drink
- Take time to soak in the moment together (watch the sun set or rise!)
- Connect with loved ones through video calls
- Share an intimate picnic, desserts, or first meal as a married couple
- Read letters from family and friends who couldn’t be present
Remember: an elopement day has the ultimate flexibility and personalization. You can spend the day however you want, and hold your ceremony during any part of it you like! If that feels totally overwhelming, click here for my list of 50 ideas for ways to spend your elopement day.
Including Others in Your Day
Remember, choosing to elope doesn’t mean you can’t include others in your celebration. Many couples opt for:
- A private vow exchange followed by a celebration with family later
- Including a few close family members or friends in the ceremony and/or parts of their elopement day (yes you can elope with guests, and no they don’t have to be part of every moment!)
- Live-streaming or recording the ceremony for loved ones
- Planning a post-elopement reception
- Bringing some loved ones along for the full ride – share your favorite day and your favorite place with dear folks who may or may not have experienced these places before!
Your Ceremony, Your Way
The beauty of an elopement ceremony lies in its flexibility. Whether you dream of exchanging vows on a canyon cliffside at sunrise, beneath a desert arch at sunset, or in a golden fall forest before dinner, your ceremony can be as unique as your love story.
Remember, there’s no “right” way to have an elopement ceremony. The most important thing is that it feels authentic to you and your relationship. Whether you include traditional elements or create something entirely your own, your ceremony should reflect who you are as a couple – it’s really not so serious to get too hung up on! If you hire a great officiant, they are trained in the art of ceremony and can bring your love story to life in a magnificent and elevated celebration of a ceremony.
Ready to start planning your perfect elopement day? Let’s chat about making your vision a reality!
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